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Wednesday, April 22, 2009

30 minutes

Waiting for a the corporate equivalent of a war is mostly boredom. My father, who was in the South Pacific during WWII told me about the very same thing. Long periods of boredom punctuated by moments of intense action.

It was good to get out in the late afternoon for 30 minutes of slow running at the Saratoga Track. Still warm but not like the last several days. It had been months since I had last joined the Wednesday night group. I showed up like some wraith from another past (certainly not mine!). I was everyman who rose up one last time for one last run, cheating injury and illness for the moment.

I use to worry about sleep. As a runner, I was possessed by the thought that if I didn't get 8 good hours a night that I would be useless the next day. I still value sleep but I no longer obsess about it. It is a luxury born on the wave of being at peace with oneself. I am comfortable with who I am, to be sure, but I am not at peace. I don't think I am wired that way. Besides, philosophically I know that I will sleep the sleep of the dead for an eternity and that living longer or sleeping more will do little to enhance my enjoyment of life. My friends drone on about how long they are going to live (based on their life style and their parentage......boring!!!!).

Sitting on a couch staring at my (future) grand kids. Now that is scary. Nailing down my family with grand child ogling events. That is death before death.

I would rather be ashes than dust!
I would rather that my spark should burn out
in a brilliant blaze than it should be stifled by dry-rot.
I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom
of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet.
The function of man is to live, not to exist.
I shall not waste my days trying to prolong them.
I shall use my time.


Jack London

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