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Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Staring Down Death

The Bay Area is getting pelted. The rain came steadily today like a bombing raid on an enemy city during a war. I had to talk myself out the door for 10 minutes of walking and 20 minutes of 30-30 (30 second jog, 30 second walk).

Danny and I had breakfast late in the morning and then went to see Linda, our friend who is battling pancreatic cancer. Battling is the operative word. I would have said dying but she is not going down without a fight. I think I walked out of there with a deep impression of her spirit.

She thinks she will make it back to work. Just not now. Her words. I am not strong enough right now.

She is down to 75 pounds, hasn't felt decent in 6 months and yet still has a strong sense of independence and retains her sense of wry humor.

One aspect of courage is staring down death. Linda is in the process of doing that right now.

I told her that I was enjoying work and that she had something to do with that. I am back inside because she can't be. Someone had to take your place, I said. We both laughed.

As I left I gave her a hug and said, "We miss you. We want you back."

"I am going to try," she said. I knew she meant it.

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